Only the false self believes in ‘score keeping’. It weighs what it believes has value and can deliver some kind of ‘pay-off’ that is worth the effort. This ‘bean-counting’ is applied to its entire life. “Has my life so far and with all I have done, all the hard work, all the suffering and sacrifices … been worth it?” This kind of questioning illustrates how important all its accomplishments, accolades and awards, recognition and contributions to a so called ‘better life and world’ are to it. In the moment ‘worthiness’ takes the number one position to it since ‘unworthiness’ is at the core of its illusory existence.
As it nears the end of its body-mind experience it will reminisce endlessly about good and bad times telling itself and anyone who will listen to its tedious stories of glories and disappointments, living most of its remaining days in the past it believes was real. This is its way of validating a life hopefully well spent or perhaps lamented as it wears its victim badge declaring: “I did the best I could!”
None of this is important or real … it is the dreamers parting salutation to a life lived in illusions. There is no judgment about so called good or bad here this is simply how humanity has lived for eons always counting the cost of everything against the possible gain.
Scriptures erroneously call this “… dying in your sins …”, but there ‘is’ no such thing as sin [a made-up concept to control followers with fear]. It really means leaving the body-mind experience still in the imprisoned belief in separation with all conditioning still intact.
The SELF never counts the cost, IT simply says YES to ‘What Is’ and flows with each moment Free of ‘attachment’ and unconcerned about so called contributions or accomplishments. IT ‘knows’ that the Light of BEING-ness lives in and as Freedom and this touches everything with its LIFE-giving embrace. Your Freedom is your ‘only’ real concern and takes precedence over everything. To the false self this is selfish but to the God You Are … it is Self Love. Freedom is your ‘only’ Purpose until you ‘are’ Free – then your Real LIFE begins.
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