THE SOUND OF DESPERATION

JOHN MCINTOSH

“The mass of men [humanity] lead lives of quiet desperation … “ - Henry David Thoreau.

A man walks through a parkette in the inner city speaking loudly to anyone nearby as if they were old friends. Someone speaks to him about his behaviour and the man flies into a rage banging a nearby coffee table again and again. Most who observe the scene believe the man is clearly deranged. However, as long as one believes they are a separate individual person … they too are deranged - this means most of humanity. The difference with most of humanity and those like this man is that they are ‘quietly desperate’. Beneath the so called ‘normal’ facade is a simmering cauldron of angst, much of it hidden from conscious awareness.

Physical disorders of every kind have their beginnings in this sea of concealed discord, which are tailor-made around the unique conditioning that defines each illusory separate self. The openly chaotic behaviour of the man is a sign of this discontent being involuntarily released rather than suppressed. Whether it ‘is’ involuntary or not in many cases this is closer to ‘authenticity’ than the vast majority of cool exteriors that mask rage, depression and a host of effects that conditioning would produce if allowed ‘out’.

When one is Truly ready for Freedom this ocean of discontent will have to be faced in the fire of who one is NOT.

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